Updates Galore

Some quick updates:

Trevor is doing well in 3rd grade. It's been a trying year with remembering things, not rushing through our work and focusing on things but he's on target and still loves going to school. He's requested to continue at BCE so I think we'll finish out elementary school there (instead of transferring to our home school.)

We're deep into Spring ball - Pinto A's team. Justin is the PA (aka assistant coach) and this has also been a trying season. Games are here and there in terms of consistency in playing as a team, but as for Trevor he's doing well. We're going to try All-Stars this summer to see if baseball is 'his thing.' Pray for us -- I hear it's daily practices and tournaments weekly!!

Janice has been watching Trevor after school each day so he gets to ride the bus home! I'm glad that it worked out so we could save a little money and help the MIL out as well.  Plus T gets to spend time with her.

For summer Trevor will attend a school near work a few weeks, be with my parents a few weeks and have some vacation time. We're heading on a road trip this year instead of Cabo so we can see some US sites!  We'll hit Big Bend, Grand Canyon, Carlsbad Caverns, Sedona, Vegas and the Hoover Dam!  I'm already exhausted planning it but I hope it's fun for all.  A little camping (glamping!) and some road trip games should make it memorable!

Work is going -- We're both content and that's fine!  I was able to pay off all my debt and we're focused on getting J there as well.  Even talking about buying some property (investment or to build on one day.)  Photography is good - kind of plateaued but that's ok with me. I kind of have my weekends back and I like that!

We're just counting down the days of school and tip vacation. It's going by so fast some days I just can't keep up with all that is going on!

Blessings and Love -
The Hills

Bueller.....Bueller...... I've been MIA

So it occurred to me the other day that I haven't posted in awhile. Not sure why - I mean I could chalk it up to a bunch of excuses but mostly it's just because I haven't made myself sit down and write something.

I used to write a lot - by hand. Yes I had a journal (or a diary) and some tell the stories of a misunderstood, confused youth and young lady; ramblings of a tired mom and wife; and of course secrets into the mystery that is me.

I remember how much of a release it was for me to write -- to just jot down every emotion in my head, in my heart. Not care if I spelled a word right or wrong; or if my sentences were grammatically correct (obviously I still don't care! ha) It would just flow -- sometimes so fast I couldn't make my hand keep up with my thoughts. I used to write poetry; love poems; heart ache poems; poems about the tribulations of love and loss.  I used to read --- A LOT.  But now I just don't have the time.  Well, I don't MAKE the time.

Today I was talking to a peer about dancing -- dancing used to be my life. It was my release along with writing. I don't seem to do either any more. So many things that once I became a mom I just couldn't find time for. I'm not blaming my child; I certainly blame me. Priorities just changed - shifted. I find myself dancing in the car with T instead of in my room with the music blaring. I write these little blogs (when I can) to preserve memories for T and so he can know me.

Lately, I've just been trying to find that passion again - that drive. The stuff that made or makes me ME. The things that make ME happy and fulfilled. Maybe other moms feel this way too. That you've lost yourself somewhere in motherhood and being a spouse and working a full time job (or 2!) Maybe I'm just the only one who hasn't figured it all out. Maybe no one else wants to admit that.

 They aren't kidding when people say  "mid-life crisis." At some point I think we all hit a moment in our life when we stand in front of the preverbal mirror and say "who am I?"  I feel like I know who I am -- but somewhere along the last few months especially, I feel like I've lost that sense.  I've realized I don't do a lot of the things that used to bring me such joy, such release, such comfort. Maybe I have replaced them with other things? Maybe I just locked them away and need to remember where I put that key (probably next to that other thing I can never find!)

Perhaps, this is my own way of telling myself "Lindsay MAKE the time." So that's my message to all of you who aren't MAKING the time; who have been, like me, "too busy" or denying that you haven't lost yourself. Make the time -- even if it's just for 15 minutes on a Wednesday night, while your kiddo is at baseball practice and the house is actually quiet. :)